July bought me another year of life. That I happily celebrated. Yes, I said happily.
It bought me a lot of changes too. It definitely tested the growth that I thought I gained. And I am proud to say that I passed it. I hit a few walls and challenges that would have ended differently if I continued with some of the old patterns that I had. Instead of acting like the hot young me, I took the time to think the whole situation through before I took the next step or said the next sentence. It matters how you respond to something. Especially, if your intention is to do the right thing for you.
Responding or acting in the same ill manner as someone else does not make for a better situation or reaction. They will either see your demeanor and realize that they need to look at themselves and how they are acting; or they will continue on the same path. That is when you make the most important step — or you going to be a part of the foolishness or be the bigger person or the adult and remove yourself.
Removing yourself does not mean that you are running. I feel that if the other person realizes that you are walking away they are yelling at no one but themselves. They will either continue to look crazy in front of the crowd that they are performing in front of, or they are going to gain control of themselves and find another way to handle the issue. If not there could be no resolve anyway.
It is not that you cannot control it, so you are running away — but actuality neither of you can control it. What would come out of a heated discussion is more confusion and a decision that could be regrettable in the next minute.
This month I have made decision on how I need to let A LOT of things go because they were just something that I could not get a grasp of to control; mostly because there were other people involved. The stakes were higher. Then I would realize that I cannot live my life for other people because though I may live/love that way does not mean that others will.
This year, July not only brought me another birthday. One that I was proud to celebrate. One that though I originally pictured differently was something that I would not give back. It was perfect the way that I needed it to be. The right people were there. The right things happened. The personal happiness was there. The changes necessary to make it in my life right now also came along.
Thank you July for bringing all that you have. Though I hate to see you go, I look forward to seeing what you have to offer next year.
August I am ready for you.