Nobodys Doormat

Have you ever noticed how the people that are said to not taken advantage of you are the ones that do it.

Like your “family members”. Like your “friends”. Like your “coworkers”. It is even worst when the family members are your coworkers too. That is something that I know. Currently, my family members are my coworkers and supervisors. It is highly annoying.

You are a kind person. You have skills that others do not have — or that’s what they say. Then you realize that all it is, is that they are lazy and no one wants to do anything so you end up doing it. Or your attitude becomes a big part of a conversation, you start to tone down or work on the things discussed. Which leads to the point that you end up sticking up for yourself less. How is that better? It isn’t.

You begin to take a lot of rude or inconsiderate comments from other people and because you are ‘working on yourself’ you do not retaliate against them. You don’t give a quick response, you just let it be.  Some would just say that that is being an adult who is thinking clearly and knows how to act.  I understand that there are times to bite your tongue, but there is never a time when you should just allow yourself to be taken advantage of.

With family members it is worst. You get asked to do a lot of favors when these favors are not really favors. You are the only person that gets asked. You are the only one who gets called selfish if you say you don’t want or cannot do the favor. When there is something where rules are supposed to be required — they are not upkept because of a personal relationship. But when you want to be the stickler for order you are told to calm down and just let things flow.

That was a really personal thought about being someones doormat.  Really think about it though.  How often are you guilt tripped, manipulated or conned to do something?  Regardless to who they are.  There are activities that are a part of your position.  Then there are things that have nothing to do with your position yet you are stuck doing the work, not getting the credit or acknowledged about it.

It happens way more than any of us really want to admit.  It always seems like after the one time that someone gets what they want from you, they continue to try to get more.  It leads me to desire to pack up and leave everything that I know behind.

I started working on this draft a week ago, and today just happened to be a day where everyone tried to make me their doormat.

It always feels like a smack in the face, spit on my shoe or someone throwing something at me.

Being used and walked over never is a good feeling.  Mentally and emotionally it leads people to other people who seem like they are treating them “better”, when all that person is doing is manipulating them in a different way.  This ends up going two ways.  It lends to a disturbing cycle or it lends to someone realizing that there needs to be a change and their personal group gets smaller.

This connects to my concept of no blog.  The power to say no is one that should never be taken away from anyone.  The ability to stand strong for yourself, and know your worth is something that should shine through to everyone – regardless of their relationship.

–  Showing your strength to your supervisor respectfully with your work can get you further in your career then sitting back and being timid.

–  Standing up to your family, will guarantee that you are seen as a person who has feelings and deserves respect.

–  Putting yourself before the needs of others whom are selfish will leave you with the assured that you can care for yourself – when you care for someone who is selfish, you are left in the shadows trying to find your way out.



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